Emotional Intelligence - Life Skills Weekly

The term “Emotional Intelligence” was coined in 1990 by two researchers who described it as “a form of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and action” – History of EQ). In 1996, Dan Goleman popularized the term in his book of the same name. Goleman wrote that Harvard Business School research had showed that “EQ counts for twice as much as IQ and Technical Skills in determining who will be successful”.

Other researchers have questioned whether certain traits or skills should be characterized as a form of intelligence. Research has also brought into question whether emotional intelligence accurately predicts academic or leadership success separately from personality and general intelligence. Might emotional intelligence be aptitudes, or personality traits? Moral qualities? Can it be learned? Does knowledge of emotions influence our behavior? Is emotional intelligence better described as general intelligence about emotions? Even though the accuracy of calling these traits or skills another type of intelligence has been questioned, we can still consider awareness of emotions, and skillfulness with them, an important set of Life Skills.

The Institute for Health and Human Potential (IHHP) defines emotional intelligence as being aware that emotions can drive our behavior and impact other people (positively and negatively), and being able to manage both our own and others’ emotions—particularly under stress (What is emotional intelligence?). A test for EQ might ask questions like how effectively you handle criticism or give and take feedback, how you manage setbacks or pressure, and how well you can see others’ perspectives.

There are four or five components or principles of Emotional Intelligence often listed:

Self-awareness
Self-management or Self-regulation
Empathy
Ability to build relationships or Social Skills
Motivation

Another term that is often used in the workplace is “soft skills”. These are skills like communication, teamwork, empathy, and adaptability as opposed to “hard skills” like knowing Excel formulas, understanding accounting concepts, or being good at math. Just like learning math sets us up for success in science or engineering, becoming more fluent in the language of emotion sets us up for greater success in relationships, careers, and even parenting.

Here are some additional resources on Emotional Intelligence:

If we can identify and manage our own emotions, we will be much more likely to succeed in our interactions with others. Join us next week for a primer on ‘Feelings’!